Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Monday, December 17, 2012
Monday, December 10, 2012
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Monday, October 1, 2012
Thursday, July 19, 2012
I stopped, turned the car off, and proceeded to pull out and flip over every box in my garage. The meowing stopped. I could not find the phantom kitty. The meowing started again, and it was not coming from the boxes in my garage. It sounded like it was just outside of my garage. I walked to my car and it got louder. I popped my hood and at first couldn’t see anything, but then there it was. A little gray kitten, laying on top of my engine looking at me like, “you’re not my mother!”
I proceeded to scold Roger and told him to get out, I had to go to work. He didn’t listen. I shooed him with my hand and after a couple tries, he finally scurried down and took off like a sonic the hedgehog blur yeowling the whole way. Not sure where he went, but the meows got quieter and quieter. Perhaps he found another garage to crash in. I figure it must have been one of the stray wild kittens we have around the hospital that crawled in my car while I was at work Monday night, that went for a fun ride, since I never leave my garage door open.
It dawned on me as I was driving to work that I had named the kitty Roger, because it lived in my garage, and I found it in my car that I named Jolly. They made a perfect pair.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Update: the tuna disappeared, but I couldn't find the phantom kitty and it wouldn't run out when I opened the garage door. I'll have to find a way to get it out tomorrow.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
I took a second to decide if I wanted to do the shoe smash or bug spray and came to the conclusion that I didn’t want to have to get any closer to it than I had to and opted for the spray. I calmly stood up, got the raid from under my kitchen sink, and returned to introduce the large 8 legged bugger to death. This is the second ugly brown spider that I’ve come across inside my living space in the last few days. I don’t like it! The last one I smashed with a shoe after trapping it under a cup and staring at it for 5 minutes gathering my courage to lift the cup off of him before hurling said shoe full force upon it (I put paper under the cup first for easy clean up post smash).
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Monday, May 21, 2012
Saturday, May 19, 2012
My trusty shoes I wear with every workout...and jogging too. I'm going to need new ones soon
And here's me looking goofy pre work out this morning. We'll spare the blogosphere an image of post workout. Nobody should have to see that mess.
Friday, May 18, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Friday, April 27, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Monday, April 16, 2012
Since my first Insanity day 2 weeks ago, my weight remains exactly the same down to the tenth of a pound. My leg, arm, and chest measurements also remain the same. I have lost 1/4th of an inch off my hips and 3/4ths of an inch off my waist for a total of 1 inch lost.
I was nervous going into the fit test today. I kind of had an idea of what my measurements and weight would be since I can weigh and measure whenever I want, but I had no idea where I would be with the fit test. I dreaded not seeing any improvement, or doing worse, but I was worrying needlessly. I saw enough improvement in each exercise that let me know that I’m not just wearing myself out every day for nothing. The exercise I had the least improvement in was the push up jack. I only improved by one, but I know my pushups were of a better quality than they were 2 weeks ago and I still improved by one. It helps knowing what my number was before to push me to do better. There were a couple times when I was ready to quit and then looked at my last fit test results and pushed myself that much harder just to get a few more in.
Overall I’m happy with my improvement with the fit test and I’m happy to have lost an inch overall of fat off my body. I would have liked to have seen more weight (any weight for that matter) off the scale since it’s my dream to get down to a certain number, but I guess if my body is getting smaller numbers aren’t everything.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Pure cardio kicks my BUTT. And I was a little miffed at Shaun T for making me do cardio abs after. Today was the first time the ab workout was introduced in the program. I was completely exhausted from the “pure cardio” workout, and then one of the first things you do in the ab workout is jump and bring your knees up. It was so freaking hard after 40 minutes of insane “pure cardio”. At one point you’re supposed to sit in a C position and lift both your legs with your core (bend in, stretch out, lift up lower down) with your hands resting on the floor at your side just in front of your butt. ARE YOU KIDDING? I felt like my legs were a bajillion pounds and I couldn’t even get them an inch off the floor. The ab workout was a little frustrating. I’m used to not being able to do every exercise in the videos and modifying things that are still hard for me to do (like any kind of pushup exercise) but for some reason I was especially irritated about it in the ab workout. I guess I lose patience after the first 42 minutes of butt kicking.
This week I was very upset because I had to miss 2 days of working out. I did wind up getting sicker, but I was feeling better almost right away so at least I only missed 2 days instead of being wiped out for an entire week. I had a fever on Tuesday and couldn’t even go to work. I was so mad at my body for not keeping me healthy. It seemed I just finally got over my last snotty episode and here I am with another. I hated missing work and I hated missing an insanity workout. I had imagined finishing the 2 months looking at the calendar with check marks on every single work out day. Wednesday I went to work, but still wasn’t feeling up to par and passed on that workout as well. Thursday I was “eased” back in with “cardio recovery”, yesterday I did “cardio power and resistance” in the morning and went for my old 3.5 mile hilly jog in the late afternoon snot and all. I felt like I had to do something extra for missing a couple days and I wanted to see how jogging went after not doing it for 2 weeks. I felt like I owned the hills a bit better than I used to and judging by the amount I was jogging vs walking and how I was feeling I was thoroughly expecting to turn out a better time, but my time stayed the same average time it was before- so that was disappointing. I guess I was jogging slower than I thought, but I have to remember it’s only been 2 weeks, it was my second workout of the day, I’ve got a cold, and my time didn’t get any worse.
My exercise is done for the week, and I’m happy for a rest tomorrow. Monday is the start of week 3 with the fit test and I’ll re-weigh and take measurements again.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Needless to say today was rough. I was watching more than participating even though my body felt like I was doing everything. I woke up during my sleep today with a mild fever and discomfort whenever I took a deep breath that would make me cough. I finally got up at 4 after about 12 hours of sleep and still felt crummy but there’s no way I was going to miss a workout. It was really really hard today and I hated not being able to do as much as I know I could do if I felt better. Even the stupid warm up and cool down deep breaths were hard.
Before I began I started out by weighing myself to see my weekly progress and I gained a pound and a half since last Monday. Dang you Easter and the three days of chocolate cake and fudge I indulged on. I have a hard time believing that I gained a whole pound and a half of fat though just because I had some cake and fudge over 3 days while I was still working out as hard as I was. Maybe the pound and a half I gained was muscle, maybe it was the pound and a half of chocolate I ate, but either way, Easter is over and I have no more candy or dessert in my house and I expect the scale to go down eventually.
On the bright side, until today when I wasn’t feeling all that great I’ve been enjoying the workouts. I’ve been able to wake up and work out and still make it through a whole shift of work without wanting to die. My muscles are no longer sore in a painful way. Saturday I got to a point where I did the entire warm up without stopping (I was slower than the rest of the group, but I didn’t stop) and I haven’t missed a workout yet. Here’s hoping I’m not really sick or get any worse.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Today is day number one of Insanity.
Technically it’s week 2 since I kind of started last week, but I’m marking today as my official start day since when I started last week I wasn’t expecting to really “do” insanity so I didn’t take my measurements or do the fit test you’re supposed to do on your first day and every 2 weeks after.
I bought the insanity DVD’s last December after watching an infomercial, liking that it didn’t require any special equipment, and asking my brother who had done it before (along with other workout programs like P90X) if he thought it was worth my money. He assured me it was and encouraged me to do it. I was looking for something I could do inside when it was too cold, wet or
icy to go outside. The only thing was it was never too cold, wet or icy for me to go jogging outside. I even went jogging in the rain. Shaun T sat trapped in his DVD’s on my shelf for the last 3 months. I usually go jogging for just under 3.5 miles around my hilly neighborhood on the days I don’t work minus Sundays. So some weeks I only go out 1 time, other weeks as many as 4 times but usually 2-3 times a week. On the days I work I usually don’t eat as much and figured being a nurse for 12 hours was good enough to wear me out, so I didn’t go jogging on those days. For now, I’m going to put my jogging aside and give Insanity a whirl.
Last week I went home to visit and my brother was home visiting too. He told me to bring my insanity DVD’s so he could “show me how it’s done”. I was shown. After the first day doing the plyometric workout I was so sore I could hardly move. I was especially feeling it in my back and calves. I felt like a little old lady hobbling around. My glutes and quads were tired, but not nearly as sore as my back and gastrocnemius and I attributed that to the hills I frequently walk/jog around where I live. It hurt, but I liked having new sore muscle areas. I found the insanity workouts left me more tired and gave me a more complete body workout than jogging has ever done for me and got my heart rate higher than jogging did too. The next day my brother and I went for a 2 mile jog instead of a workout because I was too sore for anything else. I finished the week doing an insanity workout every day and decided I would actually “do” insanity and since it was more effective and complete than jogging it was worth doing right rather than just an exercise supplement for when I didn’t want to go outside (because as it turns out I’ll always want to go outside anyway).
So today is my official day 1 with it being Monday, allowing me to line up with the workout calendar they provide for you. I have documented today’s weight, measurements and results of the day 1 fit test so I can track my progress over the next 60 days. I refuse to take pictures in my underwear.
The hardest part I’m anticipating is working out on the 3 days a week I work. I work a 12 hour night shift. When I get home from work in the morning I shower, eat and go to sleep. Then I wake up, eat, get ready for work, read a chapter out of the Book of Mormon and go back to work. In order to fit in my workouts (Insanity requires 6 days a week with a rest day on Sunday) I’ll have to wake up an hour (or more) earlier than I usually do. I’m afraid with the physical exertion and less sleep, and inability to always be able to eat every few hours while I’m there I’m going to be extra tired at work…but I’m going for it anyway.
Right now, I can’t even make it through the entire warm up without taking a break. Every time Shaun T says “know your limits” or “it’s ok to take a break” during the actual workout I’m already taking one. My goals with insanity are: improve my fit test by any amount every 2 weeks, be able to get through the entire warm up (warm up mind you, not the whole workout) without a break by the end of the first month, and to lose 10 pounds by the end of the 60 days. Right now I’m only 5 pounds away from the goal weight I’ve had for the last 10 years that I came close to once in nursing school, but have never actually made it to. I’m hoping insanity can bring me there minus another 5 pounds or so.
I don’t expect I’ll be able to do an entire workout without an unscheduled breathing break (or several breaks) at any point in the next 2 months, but I’m ok with that. I’m doing as much as I can and it’s definitely a workout. After the first month it gets kicked up a notch and you move on to the next set of videos with longer and more intense workouts so I’m pretty sure I’m never going to catch up…at least not in the 2 month time frame the program lasts, but I get my heart rate up and my muscles are sore so I’m pretty sure that’s all that matters even if I’ll never be able to do the entire workout without breaks.
I like that all the exercises don’t require any equipment and I can do it in my little living room without much space. All it takes is a tv, dvd player, and a willingness to move. That's one of the reasons I like jogging. All you need is running shoes and outside. Another thing I enjoy about jogging is seeing my improvement in how far up a certain hill I can jog before walking, or how much faster I finish my route than before. I like that insanity gives you ways to see and track your improvement also. I look forward to seeing good changes. It will be interesting to see when this 2 month program is done if I'll be able to better handle the hills on my jogging route that would contribute to a faster finish time. We’ll see how it goes.
I find it ironic that I finally commit to doing Insanity when the weather starts getting nice when I originally got it for when the weather was not nice. Oh well. I might have to go for some walks on my days off in addition to my insanity workouts so I can get my outside time too.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
(we referred to the patients we took care of as “residents” since most of them lived there, so don’t be confused when you see the term “resident” in the conversation set up)
Resident: (yelling- which was her norm, she had severe dementia and frequently called out) God! God! Help me! God!
Me: He hears you, and I hear you. You’re yelling.
Resident: (In a regular speaking voice) No I’m not. I don’t hear anything!
Me: I do. You’re calling out very loudly.
Resident: I don’t believe you. (continues to yell despite inquiries into what she needs. Apparently she only needs God and he wasn’t answering- I had CNA’s who used to pretend they were God and talk back to her from behind the bedside curtain. I asked them not to, only because I didn’t feel it was respectful of the patient, OR God, and it was just kind of sad).
Me: I’m afraid you’re going to worry the other residents with your yelling. It’s Sunday, let’s use our reverent voices.
Resident: (Continues to yell even louder) GOD! GOD! Where are you?! God!
Me: God hears us better when we use quiet voices.
Resident: (In a more hushed, quiet tone) God, God. Help me, God.
I needed to hang an antibiotic for a patient who was sleeping. Not wanting to startle her and risk her pulling her arm away while I was flushing the line or attaching the med that could possibly pull the IV out I gently woke her up and explained what I was going to do. I stopped talking, and started wiping the IV port with alcohol before I flushed it and she opened her eyes, looked at me and said, “You have beautiful teeth”. I thanked her and thought it was remarkable that she could know that when I wasn’t smiling or speaking to show my teeth when she finally opened her eyes and looked at me.
(This conversation is also about teeth, but it’s a different day with a different resident. I find teeth are a common conversation topic among the elderly and confused…maybe because they don’t have theirs anymore)
Resident: You have beautiful teeth.
Me: Thank you!
Resident: Yes, yes, and you know what? You need to go to the dentist!
Me: I do?
Resident: Yes you do. Your teeth are awful.
Me: Oh no, they are? They’re all messed up huh?
Resident: Yes, you need to go to the dentist.
Me: Ok, I will
Resident: You will? Where will you go to the dentist?
Me: Just around the corner here.
Resident: Where? I want to go around the corner to the dentist.
Me: I’m not really going to go to the dentist. I was just pretending.
Resident: You lied to me?
...A few minutes later with the same lady...
Resident: Well, you’re all smiles.
Me: Yes I am!
Resident: (Suddenly switching to a severely scolding tone) Well you’d better stop it.
Me: (Smile instantly replaced with a very sincere looking face) Ok, smiles gone. No smiling.
She nodded her approval and I had to walk away so she wouldn’t see me laughing.
Resident: You’d better study. You need to study the book.
Me: Which book?
Resident: You know which book.
Me: I do?
Resident: Yes you do. And you’d better say your prayers.
Me: Ok, I’ll say my prayers.
I heard a couple female residents calling out for help and found a confused male resident was trying to go into their room, and they didn’t want him in there. I figured he mistakenly thought it was his room so I tried to re-direct him.
Me: Hi there Mr. __ .You can’t go in there. That’s not your room. Your room is this way. Watch out.”
I had to tell him to watch out for the door as I closed it because even though I pulled him back he rolled right back to go in and was reaching for the door handle with his hand. I got the door closed and stood in front of it and again told him it wasn’t his room and I’d show him where his room was.
Resident: Open that door.
Me: I’m sorry I can’t. This is the ladies bedroom, they don’t want visitors today.
Resident: You open that door or I’m gonna shoot you.
Me: That’s not very nice.
Resident: Do you really think I’m gonna shoot you?
Me: (looking him right in the eye) No. I don’t.
The resident looked at me with a steady unsmiling glare like he really did want to shoot me, raised his hand in the shape of a gun and pulled an imaginary trigger 3 or 4 times at my head, said nothing else and wheeled away in his wheel chair.
I came in to bring a paranoid delusional resident a glass of water and to see if I could calm her down because nursing had just gone in to take care of her and left her in a yelling fit…which was her norm. No matter how nice you were to her or what you did anything more than dropping off her food tray and she thought you were evil as soon as you walked in the room. If you gave her medicine or tried to give her a bath she would send you right to hell if she could. “Dirty rotten criminal” was a familiar refrain echoing out of her room.
Resident: (indignant) I thought I got rid of those kinds of people! I thought they were gone! I didn’t know she worked here still, those dirty rotten criminals! I thought I was done with them! Unless they came back when they sold this place to the Mormons. Are you a dirty rotten Mormon?
Note: our facility was recently bought and owned by a corporation run by Jewish men. And I AM a Mormon.
Me: ...uhhh, well, I’m not dirty or rotten...
Resident: Get out of here! Leave me alone, you dirty rotten criminal! Leave me alone! Get out!
Usually most of our residents were 75+, but this resident was much younger, which makes this conversation that much more interesting, and my favorite of the few I wrote down.
Resident: (Excitedly, talking to me as if she was recognizing an old friend she hadn’t seen in a long time) HI!!
Me: (I didn’t say anything at first. I looked at her confused because I had just spoken with her not even 2 minutes before about how she had a good nap and that she was feeling giddy. I thought it was weird when she said she felt giddy a couple minutes before because to me it looked like she was still sleepy from the nap, but now she was up and the giddiness was apparent. I was still confused with the new and enthusiastic greeting of “Hi” though, considering I just left her room a moment before and she was talking like it was the first time she’d seen me all day). Hi
Resident: Are you getting ready? We’re going to rendezvous at Red Lobster.
Resident: Remember? We synchronized our watches 10 minutes ago. We’re rendezvousing at Red Lobster. It’s going to be a great time. Remember? We synchronized our watches.
Let it be known: Neither one of us was wearing a watch nor had there been any conversation about watches, Red Lobster or rendezvousing anywhere. I really thought she was playing a joke but it went on:
Me: Oh man, I’m going to have to miss out on that one tonight.
Resident: You can’t make it? That’s too bad; it’s going to be a great time.
She walked off, but returned a couple minutes later back at the nurses’ station.
Me: (again?? What is going on?) Hi.
Resident: Will you come with me?
Me: Where do you want me to go?
Resident: To my room.
Me: What do you need?
Resident: I just want you in there with me.
Me: (okaaaayyy) Aww, that’s nice. I’ll tell you what. Maybe later I’ll come in for a little visit and see how you’re doing.
Resident: (with her eyes lit up like a kid at Christmas) And you’ll be my special friend?
Me: (what the heck???? Internally kind of freaking out not sure what she means, but outwardly responding politely) Yeah, I’ll be your buddy. (I was NOT going to use the term “special friend”)
Resident: Ok, and hey, even though you have to miss out on what we were talking about earlier, you should still come by tonight. We’re going to the Caribbean.
Me: Oh really? (So hard to keep a straight face talking to her)
Resident: Yeah, and we’re going to have virgin daiquiris every night. It’s going to be so much fun.
Resident: (starts walking off and calls back over her shoulder) And don’t forget to bring Charlie!
Me: Who’s Charlie?
Resident: (stops and thinks) Oh, you know. Every time I see someone pulling a bundle behind them I always call it Charlie.
Me: (What the…??)
Resident: (Laughs and walks off again calling over her shoulder) Don’t forget to bring your hubby!
Monday, March 12, 2012
Our phenotype is genetic. Or at least it used to be. Aside from hair dye, makeup, cosmetic surgery, etc. the way we look is determined through a combination of our parent’s genes. We can enhance our looks through clothing, jewelry and makeup, and ensure our bodies are healthy and therefore attractive through appropriate diet and exercise, but beyond this we are born with what we have and I think most will agree that some are born more physically beautiful than others without doing anything to earn it. They were just lucky. Even though they have beauty making them physically desirable it doesn’t mean they might not be a little “slow” or complete jerks. Because of this, and with the knowledge that “beauty fades” it is considered shallow to be attracted to or love someone based on physical appearance alone. There has to be something more substantial to base your love on.
Like intelligence? You never hear of anyone badmouthing someone for being attracted to someone because they’re smart, but really smart people are right there in the same lucky dream gene pool as the pretty people. Those people who are naturally smart, who can take everything in on the first go around and pass the test without taking notes or studying, who can say their alphabet backwards whilst completing a level 4 (or whatever the hardest level is) Sudoku puzzle, were lucky to be born with a brain that easily calculates, solves and learns. They didn’t necessarily do anything to earn that ability. And just because they’re smart doesn’t mean they’re not really ugly, or complete jerks. Therefore, I have concluded that to be attracted to someone just because they are smart is just as shallow as liking someone just because they are pretty.(Enter here childhood memories of the Anne of Green Gables movie when Diana says, “And Gilbert Blythe did say that being smart was better than being pretty”. FALSE. I have just discovered they are equals.)
There is a however. If a person works hard to be smart, I find that attractive. I also think it’s attractive when a person cares about their appearance and puts effort in to staying healthy and presentable. I’m not saying that a person who doesn’t have to work hard to be smart isn’t attractive. Just like there’s no denying pretty people who don’t have to try hard to be pretty are attractive, but alone smartness isn’t enough just as beauty isn’t enough. Beauty fades, sure. So does smartness. Dementia eventually will catch up in some degree with most people, and then we’ll be dumb and ugly with our car keys taken away wondering where our breakfast is even though it’s 3 in the afternoon. What have we got left? That’s what’s important. Yet despite this, no matter how sweet, thoughtful, good, or caring he may be, I don’t think I could ever become seriously involved with a stupid person and definitely not an ugly stupid person. It’s hard, but I’m starting to accept that I am a shallow person.